Six weeks ago, Bella informed me (via text message) that she had much better prospects. I was told that if I wanted to keep her, I needed to up my game, and pony up some cash for that gash. She was a fun chick, but ultimately I’m not in the market for a wife. I wished her well and told her not to let the door hit her in the ass on the way out. She didn’t want to ghost out immediately, however. She gave me a play-by-play of her prospects… all of whom were much cooler and better men than ya boy Boxer.
Bella made much ado, over the course of the next week, about how much fun she was having, riding different cocks. I simply wished her a good time. Eventually, I got another ultimatum.
Suddenly she decided she “had feelings” for me, after a week of fucking random men. She told me she had lots of potential suitors, and she wanted to be sure I knew what I was giving up, before she committed to one lucky fellow.
I told her that I hoped she’d be very happy with her new beau. Then she went quiet.
Suddenly, this week, Bella reappeared. I have to assume that this two-month relationship wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. For the last four days, she’s badgered me with the same questions, and I’ve given her the same answers.
There’s only one way to keep your dignity intact. When a wimminz decides to give you an ultimatum, you point to the door, and invite her to walk out of it. Ironically, when you do this, you gain a certain measure of respect, and open up the possibility of her coming back.
When (and it’s usually when, not if) she reappears, you have the choice to reject her, or to allow her to re-enter orbit. If you choose the second option, you have an obligation to see that she reattaches at a wildly reduced level of commitment and obligation than she originally enjoyed. To do otherwise is to allow the bitch to see you as a sort of revolving-door, who will permit her to come and go as she pleases.
Wimminz have several distinct methods of conflict, and one of the most annoying is on display above. Rather than making a sound argument in support of her position, a wimminz like this will merely repeat the same demand — over, and over, and over again — ad infinitum. This repetition is probably very effective on a typical male, who ends up acquiescing to her demand, however ridiculous or arrogant, simply because he wants her to shut the fuck up.
This is similar to the torture used on American Prisoners of War in the Korean conflict, by interrogators in the Chinese People’s Liberation Army. It is a particularly abusive form of brainwashing which can eventually lead to a man questioning his own sanity.
Wimminz who use such techniques are used to operating from a position of strength. The most effective way to combat such tactics is by never allowing such a wimminz to have any leverage over you whatever. Imagine what your life would be like if you were actually in a relationship with such a wimminz. Is it any wonder that ya boy Boxer’s replacement dumped this bitch after a mere two months?
The bottom line is to identify wimminz who do this early, and keep them at arm’s length by any means necessary. You don’t want to live with a wimminz who turns to these sorts of games, whenever she doesn’t get her way. You certainly don’t want to have any children with her.
Is this a good Christian divorce. You said that you were living right something about her a few weeks ago but nothing ever came of it.
It appears that this wimminz only looks at what is in her heart at some particular time and think that’s the way things should be. What’s coming out of the man’s heart doesn’t matter. Six week ago you moved on…who cares she has feelz for you now. If she has feelz for another guy two months later, then that’s the new truth.
I’ll tell you when things started turning around for me…I stopped looking at whatever feelz I had at the time and started listening to what was coming out of her mouth. If she doesn’t want to be there anymore for whatever reason, I’d agree to show her the door and I’ll move on. Life’s too short to be living on her changing whims.
The redhead has reappeared a couple of different times, but she hasn’t been pushy or rude about it, so there turned out to be nothing to update. Cool females can take “no” for an answer, and I have no reason to lampoon them here.
In the end, if a woman wants to be a ho’, that’s all good, but the rules of being a ho’ include accepting “no”.
She seems pretty easy to see through. Still many guys fall for it until they wise up. Then it is on the the next guy. When she turns 35 however…
Given some hypothetical NAWALT woman, the prevailing wisdom around here is that there is no such thing and to move on.* But not everyone is like Boxer: not in the market for a wife. She lacks a (any?) man that she respects and follows. But she only needs one and you will fill that role.
I’ve argued in the past that close friendship, while not a requirement, is an excellent strategy for finding a quality wife. The goal is to friend up the woman until she becomes a close confidant. Give her the advice and guidance she badly needs. If she follows it, you’ll have a potential future wife. But even if she doesn’t turn into that, she could actually turn her life around.
This process should take a few years, during which neither of you has any sex (because that’s the biblical mandate and this whole process doesn’t work otherwise). Repeat this process in parallel until you have many close female friends who confide in you first. Prune out the ones that are obviously not going to work. The more the better, as many of them will eventually see you as just a friend.
Besides a potential wife, what’s in it for you? In cold analytic terms, you learn to manipulate women in a healthy manner to set her frame. This lets you sort through the bad and good women much more effectively, cutting through their own manipulations. This saves time and frustration. Being friends with these women also opens up access to new potential sources of quality women that you didn’t previously have access to.
Ultimately, you want a woman who is sexually faithful, respects you, and can follow your leadership. The only way to ensure this is to make sure it happens before you even consider getting married. No one can do this but you. Waiting for a woman to fall into your lap just isn’t going to happen.
* Regarding NAWALT, most marriages do not end in divorce, so by definition the non-divorced married woman (the median case) sets the pattern.
Good advice, Derek. Trying to sort out the obedient ones from the rebellious ones is certainly wisdom much more worthwhile. The best frame a man can have is obedience (to the Lord)…because if you have this frame it’ll either set hers or she will flee from it.
OT…but you’ve mentioned it before about Muslim wimminz.
‘Arab Spinster Crisis Proves Toxicity Of Female Empowerment Is Worldwide’
http://www.returnofkings.com/180102/arab-spinster-crisis-proves-toxicity-of-female-empowerment-is-worldwide
“I.ve argued in the past that close friendship, while not a requirement, is an excellent strategy for finding a quality wife. The goal is to friend up the woman until she becomes a close confidant. …This process should take a few years, during which neither of you has any sex”
Hormones make this completely unrealistic. Any young man who can befriend an attractive young woman for years before making the relationship sexual is so sexually dead, he won’t even mind being celibate. At that speed, if the first two chicks he befriends don’t pan out then he’ll be middle-aged for the third attempt.
At that age, I couldn’t talk to a woman for five minutes because I wanted to fuck, not talk. It’s a good bet that half the reason none of those women wanted me was how twitchy and distracted I got, trying to show interest in her insipid chatter while trying to not show interest in her boobs. Hoverhand much? And it turned out to all be a shit test, anyway.
In fact, I felt that familiar old pain just reading Boxer’s OP. My brain is bleeding! God shouldn’t put Boxer in Hell because he’s already been there and boinked that.
The hate for women on this blog is toxic and this post is especially hilarious. The writer is too busy whining and complaining to see what is really happening, just under his nose. He is being played. Gentlemen, you cease to be magic the minute we leave our teenage years. The woman texting Boxer is playing him like a cheap guitar. Like this man, you are all second rate, and all your tears in a bucket wont save you. When we reach a certain point, we all realize that we don’t have to put up with you any longer, and since you are a pain to deal with, we dump you and move on. That’s the issue that none of you can accept. Boxer can not accept it, and is here constantly whining about being rejected, by one woman after another. The man is a loser, who has never been able to satisfy a woman in his entire life, and he is rationalizing this to make it look like it’s his choice to be miserable and rejected. This woman that Boxer is crying about is only one of many. She dumped him because he stunk up her house, he had a small dick, or he was too broke to pay his share of the bill. She has moved on, and is happy. Her house smells good, and now she is with a winner. He is here crying on the internet. He is also not very smart. He apes smart people like a trained monkey, using their words, but continues to behave stupid. He’s a miserable, stupid moron. Gentlemen, remember that the better you treat your woman, the easier your life will be. Boxer is the example that proves this rule.
The Mormon God is sending me to Hell anyway. We call it outer darkness.
Mormons can be forgiven for fucking sluts (look at Joseph Smith for a great example), but the act of indulging in pagan polytheistic idolatry, by going to mass, saying prayers to Mary and Jesus, and being friends with guys like you and Earl, is something you just can’t ever come back from.
I’m at peace with it, and welcome Elohim’s judgment. If He exists, I doubt he’s as much of an asshole as the prophets and apostles make him out to be. Anyway, He designed my mind, and so he knew that the papists and their satanic false-teachings would appeal to me. My apostasy must have been pre-ordained, and that’s that.
Boxer
I found the easiest way to drive the devout Mormon missionaries away was to talk about Christ.
Well that and telling them that our church had the actual Peter, John, and James who directed their successors…and not somebody who had a dream about them.
“The hate for women on this blog is toxic and this post is especially hilarious.”
Another point to Boxer.
I wonder who it is considered to be toxic for…
When you see a blanket dismissal rather than a discussion that tells you something
‘Gentlemen, you cease to be magic the minute we leave our teenage years.’
There’s that internal projection again.
Heck men are more generous…we give you at least until 25.
‘Gentlemen, remember that the better you treat your woman, the easier your life will be. ‘
We got kicked out of paradise following that advice.
Wimminz, remember the more obedient you are to God and your husband…the holier your life will be.
In short, this game playing woman that Boxer brushed off would make a poor mother and wife.